Granola was calling me from the depths of my pantry the other night.
It wasn’t literally calling me in the way that I actually heard voices, but it was calling me through my soul. Maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration.
Most people might remember as kids, running as hard and as fast as we could. Maybe you were on the playground at school, or at the park, or even with a neighborhood friend, and you ran so hard that you felt almost airborne?
Your chest tightened, the bottoms of your feet smacked the ground with each step, your eyes stung from the air — and then when you stopped it was almost like you could fall over. You might have been left sucking air in and out trying to catch your breath. The adrenaline shot through your body again as you picked yourself back up and ran and ran again.
This is how I felt coming off of contest prep.
Oh, I was tired — yes. 100% yes. I was ready for a break. But at the same time when you have been running full speed ahead for awhile, and then you stop suddenly, it can be a challenge not to fall.
So I am here now, in improvement season. I have a plan for the year ahead:
- Gain muscle
- Don’t get fat
- *Okay, I know the “f” word carries some controversy so please forgive me. I mean in the sense of not putting on too much fat before my next competition.*
As my calories are getting bumped inch by inch, I am finding that I am truly sick of kamut puff cereal and rice cakes just aren’t cutting it anymore. While the first couple of weeks post show I fantasized about doughnuts, I now yearn for foods like quinoa, rice, tortillas and…well — variety.
That’s why one night last week while sitting on the couch enjoying my frozen protein shake, I heard the granola calling me from my pantry. While it wasn’t actually calling me, I could see it in my mind’s eye resting on the shelf there in the dark, all of its chocolate peanut butter goodness, waiting to be dipped into.
The devil on my shoulder nudged me, You are just beginning your off season. You have heaps of time to go up in weight and then cut. A little granola will do some good.
The angel chided, Yes, but you have a plan for a reason. Too much too soon just gets stored as fat.
The devil won that night.
Like a zombie I slowly trudged into the kitchen, pulled apart the weak, plastic ziplock that was supposed to keep the bag sealed, and dug in, knuckle length to crunchy granola. Five mouthfuls in, I put the bag back. I felt a twinge of guilt, but I also felt satiated, which outweighed the guilt.
I think the most key word here is: zombie. Although I was fully aware of what I was doing, it was like my mind went into auto-pilot and I just kept going.
About a week ago I joined in a group coaching call with one of the coaches at Vegan Proteins. I mentioned my cravings and she said something to the effect of: the farther away the goal is (stage/vacation/wedding or event) the bigger that devil on your shoulder gets.
I’m going to work on shushing that devil a bit and try to be less-zombie like even if it is Halloween.
Although I have a feeling the Halloween candy just might break open the bag and start singing my name later this evening.